Gluttony is over-indulgence in something. The most frequent association to gluttony is to food and drink, but gluttony can really be about anything. Sex, gardening, crossword puzzles, travel, movies, prayer, electronics, anything. When we focus on our desire in some experience, whether physical, intellectual, emotional or spiritual, then we have turned our back on others and are devoid of love. We are gluttons.
Americans are good at gluttony. We have more self-indulgences than any other group on the face of the Earth. And we still want more. We've turned it into a way of dealing with life. Instead of facing the pain of the world, we all too often dodge reality by wrapping ourselves up in some indulgence. An extra pint of ice cream that helps us forget how painful our current relationship is. Some extreme sports to distract us from a bad family situation. An expensive meal at a four star restaurant to transport us away from a rotten work situation. We're invited to gluttony by every advertising executive out there. Americans are just really good at the gluttony game.
So what does moderation look like, if it's such a wonderful thing? Does it mean living like monks in 8' by 4' stone cells on wooden slat beds? Is that moderation? No, that's asceticism, which can be like a form a gluttony in reverse. Moderation is all about balance and health. Instead of the relative sense of going for as much as you can in an effort to turn your back on something unpleasant, moderation is the absolute sense of focusing on what would be best. Indulgence isn't categorically wrong, but it has the nasty tendency to encourage more and more of it once you get started on the practice.
The gluttonous crossword puzzle solver spends too much time on crossword puzzles and not enough time on his friends and family. The crosswords are a place to hide, to be distracted from his life. This means that he is not thinking in loving terms, but rather in selfish terms. As with lust, gluttony is usually rooted in circumstances that encouraged the person to think of their vice as something normal and natural. This is especially true when gluttonous parents turn their backs on their children. The children learn that self-indulgence is what people do, so they grow up living that lie. Gluttony is normal for them.
Moderation isn't easy. Temptation to gluttony is everywhere in our society. Gluttony of music, of food, of possessions, of clothing. These are all things that we are encouraged into by our society. Moderation says that we won't buy those new shoes. Why? Because we don't have any real need for them. Gluttony says that we'll buy it because it's "fun" or it would be a great match for that handbag you just bought. The rationalization isn't important. Only that you are investing of your time and attention in selfish pleasures instead of thinking in terms of whether or not you need what you are indulging yourself in.
Yes, I know that the notion of "need" is foreign to so many Americans. But "need" is the root of a loving attitude when it comes to turning away from gluttony. When we embrace moderation, we indulge in material things and in activities only so much as we have need for. If we focused on needs instead of wants, we would be far better practiced in self-restraint and the ability to act willfully through conscious choice. Moderation is the incredibly loving act of will that says I will do a certain thing because it is good for me and for others. I will not do the gluttonous thing because it is not good for me and for others. Those who practice moderation have a sense of love of themselves and of others. That is their motivation; to have the greatest good come from their acts. As opposed to the gluttonous attitude that says "I'm going to focus on my petty desires for now."
Take some time to examine your favorite indulgences and figure out whether you're doing them out of a sense of the value that they bring to your life and to the lives of those you love - or if you're just hiding in a cocoon of indulgence that succeeds in shutting out the world. Where it's the latter, you're not doing yourself any favors.
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
Friday, March 30, 2007
Lust and Chastity
The first vice-virtue pair is not just about sexuality. Most generally, the pair is about the craving that drives someone to desire something. We can lust after sex, of course, but we also lust after other things. Power is a traditional focus of lust, but these days I suspect a lust for fame is pretty common as well. Certainly there are other things that we lust after.
If you're thinking that this all sounds a lot like greed, then you go to the head of the class. They're quite similar. The way to contrast lust and greed is to consider their paired virtues: chastity and generosity. Lust and chastity are about how we handle the wanting of something. Greed and generosity are about how we handle the having of something. The two are clearly closely related, but as I said in the introductory article, all the vices are fundamentally related because they are rooted in a lack of ability to love.
Those who lust have decided that something is more important than love. Sex, power, fame, etc., are so important to these people that when push comes to shove, their craving for whatever they're after will win out over doing something loving.
For example, let's say that I meet a pretty girl at a party. The loving thing to do is to treat her like I would anyone else that I respect greatly. That should be my starting point. She is capable of great depth of conversation, insights into life and love, the pursuit of a relationship with others and with God - the whole nine yards. That's the loving thing. That's the chaste thing.
But I'm not chaste. I'm a luster, so I "check her out", admiring her body. After all, I don't know anyone capable of great depth of conversation and all that drivel. What I implicitly know is that people use each other, and that she'd be fun to "use". That's just the way things are. She's just interested in using me back of course, so it all works out. From there, I approach her to begin my conquest.
Kinda sad, isn't it? The worst of it is when she acts in a way consistent with his lustful attitudes because she isn't any more chaste than he is.
The luster doesn't have the starting point of acting in a loving way because he doesn't see the chaste promise of the girl at the party. Even if she's is a "bimbo" or a "slut", she retains the capacity to do all the things I listed. A fun exposition of that idea is the Judy Holliday movie "Born Yesterday". We get a glimpse of a woman who begins to realize her potential only when she gets the word as an adult.
When I'm talking about capacity or promise, I'm talking about up-to-and-including love. Even the luster has the capacity, but he is so blinded by lust (and other delusions) that love isn't even on his radar. That's why he cannot imagine pursuing chastity. To him, chastity is an absence of lust. Without love, lust is all there is when we consider human sexuality. But what happens when we truly understand love?
Chastity is what happens. Chastity isn't just saying that you won't abuse sex, power or fame. It's saying that you will actively employ them for the gifts that they are. They are gifts because they are a means by which we can love one another. Remember; love involves acting for the best interests of everyone.
We employ sexuality as a gift when we use it as a means of creating children. I don't mean that we do this in the dark, with grim faces and in as brief a time as possible. Sexuality is something that a married couple uses as a celebration of their union. They rejoice in being physically one person as much as you can be, and look forward to the creation of new life. That second part is key because it dwarfs the purely physical part. The desire for new life is a statement of lifelong commitment to their union, of intertwining of not only limbs but of intertwining their identities in each other.
That is what chastity is about: realizing the vast potential of the human experience. The lustful people stop at the point of intertwining their bodies, while the chaste intertwine themselves body and soul. That requires great love, and it is something that the lustful are simply blind to.
This applies to power, fame and another other thing that can be lusted after. The chaste man or woman who holds power or fame understands that it is an opportunity to love others. Power is a way to move the mountains that stand in the way of love. Fame is a way to reach out lovingly to many more people than you normally could. Those who lust after power use it for selfish gain, and those who lust for fame simply self-aggrandize, reminding us of how famous they are.
Lust is a self-limiting attitude and as a result it damages us. It holds us back. It is not loving of others and it is not loving of ourselves. Chastity is the exact opposite, letting us realize a greater experience of love and life. Often the only thing standing in the way of chastity is understanding. Sometimes it just takes a leap of faith that chastity can work. You'll find that this is the pattern of all the vice-virtue pairs.
If you're thinking that this all sounds a lot like greed, then you go to the head of the class. They're quite similar. The way to contrast lust and greed is to consider their paired virtues: chastity and generosity. Lust and chastity are about how we handle the wanting of something. Greed and generosity are about how we handle the having of something. The two are clearly closely related, but as I said in the introductory article, all the vices are fundamentally related because they are rooted in a lack of ability to love.
Those who lust have decided that something is more important than love. Sex, power, fame, etc., are so important to these people that when push comes to shove, their craving for whatever they're after will win out over doing something loving.
For example, let's say that I meet a pretty girl at a party. The loving thing to do is to treat her like I would anyone else that I respect greatly. That should be my starting point. She is capable of great depth of conversation, insights into life and love, the pursuit of a relationship with others and with God - the whole nine yards. That's the loving thing. That's the chaste thing.
But I'm not chaste. I'm a luster, so I "check her out", admiring her body. After all, I don't know anyone capable of great depth of conversation and all that drivel. What I implicitly know is that people use each other, and that she'd be fun to "use". That's just the way things are. She's just interested in using me back of course, so it all works out. From there, I approach her to begin my conquest.
Kinda sad, isn't it? The worst of it is when she acts in a way consistent with his lustful attitudes because she isn't any more chaste than he is.
The luster doesn't have the starting point of acting in a loving way because he doesn't see the chaste promise of the girl at the party. Even if she's is a "bimbo" or a "slut", she retains the capacity to do all the things I listed. A fun exposition of that idea is the Judy Holliday movie "Born Yesterday". We get a glimpse of a woman who begins to realize her potential only when she gets the word as an adult.
When I'm talking about capacity or promise, I'm talking about up-to-and-including love. Even the luster has the capacity, but he is so blinded by lust (and other delusions) that love isn't even on his radar. That's why he cannot imagine pursuing chastity. To him, chastity is an absence of lust. Without love, lust is all there is when we consider human sexuality. But what happens when we truly understand love?
Chastity is what happens. Chastity isn't just saying that you won't abuse sex, power or fame. It's saying that you will actively employ them for the gifts that they are. They are gifts because they are a means by which we can love one another. Remember; love involves acting for the best interests of everyone.
We employ sexuality as a gift when we use it as a means of creating children. I don't mean that we do this in the dark, with grim faces and in as brief a time as possible. Sexuality is something that a married couple uses as a celebration of their union. They rejoice in being physically one person as much as you can be, and look forward to the creation of new life. That second part is key because it dwarfs the purely physical part. The desire for new life is a statement of lifelong commitment to their union, of intertwining of not only limbs but of intertwining their identities in each other.
That is what chastity is about: realizing the vast potential of the human experience. The lustful people stop at the point of intertwining their bodies, while the chaste intertwine themselves body and soul. That requires great love, and it is something that the lustful are simply blind to.
This applies to power, fame and another other thing that can be lusted after. The chaste man or woman who holds power or fame understands that it is an opportunity to love others. Power is a way to move the mountains that stand in the way of love. Fame is a way to reach out lovingly to many more people than you normally could. Those who lust after power use it for selfish gain, and those who lust for fame simply self-aggrandize, reminding us of how famous they are.
Lust is a self-limiting attitude and as a result it damages us. It holds us back. It is not loving of others and it is not loving of ourselves. Chastity is the exact opposite, letting us realize a greater experience of love and life. Often the only thing standing in the way of chastity is understanding. Sometimes it just takes a leap of faith that chastity can work. You'll find that this is the pattern of all the vice-virtue pairs.
Friday, March 23, 2007
Vices and Virtues
John A has again prodded me into an article or two. Or seven. He brought up the topic of the seven deadly sins and the corresponding virtues. I figured I'd take a stab at that topic.
First, we have to figure out what a sin is. "A sin is something that's 'bad'" is the usual understanding. In fact, a sin is an offense against God. Sure, breaking the law is a sin. But that's not a bottom-line measure of sin, because there are many things that are completely legal (especially in America) that are sinful. They are things that we do that are effectively a thumbing of our noses at God. And at the world in general. But why should we care?
As it turns out, God wants the very best for us. He loves us dearly. We're all His kids, after all. Would you want anything bad for your kids? Of course not. You may want them to endure certain trials and tribulations, but only as a means of building their character, having perspective and a bit of a sense of reality in their lives. But I digress.
If a sin is an offense against God and God only wants the very best for us, you can see how a sin is categorically a bad thing. It is an action that does something that isn't good for us. The worse the action, the more serious the sin. It's not a case of getting gold stars in a ledger in heaven, jumping through hoops and dotting the requisite 'i's. It's a case of living a joyful, loving, exultant experience while we spend our days as mortal beings. When you're doing that, you're living a virtuous life. When you're at the other end of the spectrum, living an unhappy, contemptuous and asocial existence devoid of love, you are living a sinful life.
I'm trying to work around to the cardinal virtues and deadly sins. To do that, we have to realize that this whole sinning business is about love. When we're acting in ways that don't exhibit love for others, we're in the sinning space. When we're acting in ways that DO exhibit love for others, we're in the virtue space. And that brings us around to the categorization of actions that the seven cardinal virtues and seven deadly sins represents. It's a way of looking at our actions to figure out if they're loving or not.
The cardinal virtues and deadly sins are really one and the same. Each virtue is paired with a sin. The virtue is an act of loving and the sin is an act of not loving. For example, let's take the pair of Gluttony and Moderation. Gluttony is the sin and Moderation is the virtue. The man who practices gluttony is the one who seeks to overindulge in whatever it is that he's a glutton about. That might be excessive eating, but it might also be excessive time at the beach. Any kind of overindulgence in a selfish pursuit is, by definition, something that is focused on "self" and not on others.
That statement should jump out at you. If your action is not predicated in loving others, then it is sinful. Not loving. Sinful. Get it? A virtuous act is something that demonstrates love for others. A sinful act is something that is devoid of love for others. We don't often have actions that are purely virtuous or purely sinful, so don't stand back at 100 feet and declare something sinful or virtuous. Take some time to look closely and see the mix of the two in any act.
Here's the list of pairs of sins and virtues:
I don't know about you, but those strike me as being powerful words. They jump to the heart of any motivation that we might have for doing pretty much anything. Imagine somebody with all the sins and none of the virtues. That would be one Walking Nightmare. Would you want them living your neighborhood, around your kids? But what about the other end of the spectrum? Someone with all those traits would seem to be your typical Christian Killjoy. Chastity, moderation, meekness AND humility? Give me a break. What do they do for fun? Rearrange their holy card collection?
That's the funny thing about the vices and virtues listed. We're all drawn to our favorite vices in the here and now, while realizing that the virtues are probably best for us in the long term. But the virtues are invariably boring, so we continue to dabble in a vice or three. The trick to life is figuring out how to see that stack of virtues as a wonderful place to be. (That's the column on the right, for those of you who are having difficulty with this) Maybe such a person wouldn't be a complete weenie, but instead could be someone as remarkable as Pope John Paul II. Or Ghandi. I'm sure you can think of other powerful, dynamic and motivated people who realized great power and influence, yet didn't turn into a hedonistic, self-aggrandizing imbecile. A jerk.
I was going to do an article on winning a lottery a while back. That article was going to touch on the fact that our ability to indulge in vices and virtues is magnified when we do something like win a lottery. We attain more power, and our inclinations to vice or virtue are put on steroids. So instead of the choice of giving $100 to a charity or blowing it on a nice meal, we have the choice of giving $100,000 to charity or renovating the entire house. Your choices of virtues and vices may be working for you now, but what would happen if you were tempted on a grander scale? Would your acts be loving or despising of those around you? Of God Himself?
In the coming articles, I'll talk a bit about each vice/virtue pair. A lot of it is going to be trying to open your eyes to why the virtues are worth pursuing. It can be tough to imagine it when the environment we're in is dominated by so much of the vice.
First, we have to figure out what a sin is. "A sin is something that's 'bad'" is the usual understanding. In fact, a sin is an offense against God. Sure, breaking the law is a sin. But that's not a bottom-line measure of sin, because there are many things that are completely legal (especially in America) that are sinful. They are things that we do that are effectively a thumbing of our noses at God. And at the world in general. But why should we care?
As it turns out, God wants the very best for us. He loves us dearly. We're all His kids, after all. Would you want anything bad for your kids? Of course not. You may want them to endure certain trials and tribulations, but only as a means of building their character, having perspective and a bit of a sense of reality in their lives. But I digress.
If a sin is an offense against God and God only wants the very best for us, you can see how a sin is categorically a bad thing. It is an action that does something that isn't good for us. The worse the action, the more serious the sin. It's not a case of getting gold stars in a ledger in heaven, jumping through hoops and dotting the requisite 'i's. It's a case of living a joyful, loving, exultant experience while we spend our days as mortal beings. When you're doing that, you're living a virtuous life. When you're at the other end of the spectrum, living an unhappy, contemptuous and asocial existence devoid of love, you are living a sinful life.
I'm trying to work around to the cardinal virtues and deadly sins. To do that, we have to realize that this whole sinning business is about love. When we're acting in ways that don't exhibit love for others, we're in the sinning space. When we're acting in ways that DO exhibit love for others, we're in the virtue space. And that brings us around to the categorization of actions that the seven cardinal virtues and seven deadly sins represents. It's a way of looking at our actions to figure out if they're loving or not.
The cardinal virtues and deadly sins are really one and the same. Each virtue is paired with a sin. The virtue is an act of loving and the sin is an act of not loving. For example, let's take the pair of Gluttony and Moderation. Gluttony is the sin and Moderation is the virtue. The man who practices gluttony is the one who seeks to overindulge in whatever it is that he's a glutton about. That might be excessive eating, but it might also be excessive time at the beach. Any kind of overindulgence in a selfish pursuit is, by definition, something that is focused on "self" and not on others.
That statement should jump out at you. If your action is not predicated in loving others, then it is sinful. Not loving. Sinful. Get it? A virtuous act is something that demonstrates love for others. A sinful act is something that is devoid of love for others. We don't often have actions that are purely virtuous or purely sinful, so don't stand back at 100 feet and declare something sinful or virtuous. Take some time to look closely and see the mix of the two in any act.
Here's the list of pairs of sins and virtues:
| Lust | Chastity |
| Gluttony | Moderation |
| Greed | Generosity |
| Sloth | Zeal |
| Wrath | Meekness |
| Envy | Charity |
| Pride | Humility |
I don't know about you, but those strike me as being powerful words. They jump to the heart of any motivation that we might have for doing pretty much anything. Imagine somebody with all the sins and none of the virtues. That would be one Walking Nightmare. Would you want them living your neighborhood, around your kids? But what about the other end of the spectrum? Someone with all those traits would seem to be your typical Christian Killjoy. Chastity, moderation, meekness AND humility? Give me a break. What do they do for fun? Rearrange their holy card collection?
That's the funny thing about the vices and virtues listed. We're all drawn to our favorite vices in the here and now, while realizing that the virtues are probably best for us in the long term. But the virtues are invariably boring, so we continue to dabble in a vice or three. The trick to life is figuring out how to see that stack of virtues as a wonderful place to be. (That's the column on the right, for those of you who are having difficulty with this) Maybe such a person wouldn't be a complete weenie, but instead could be someone as remarkable as Pope John Paul II. Or Ghandi. I'm sure you can think of other powerful, dynamic and motivated people who realized great power and influence, yet didn't turn into a hedonistic, self-aggrandizing imbecile. A jerk.
I was going to do an article on winning a lottery a while back. That article was going to touch on the fact that our ability to indulge in vices and virtues is magnified when we do something like win a lottery. We attain more power, and our inclinations to vice or virtue are put on steroids. So instead of the choice of giving $100 to a charity or blowing it on a nice meal, we have the choice of giving $100,000 to charity or renovating the entire house. Your choices of virtues and vices may be working for you now, but what would happen if you were tempted on a grander scale? Would your acts be loving or despising of those around you? Of God Himself?
In the coming articles, I'll talk a bit about each vice/virtue pair. A lot of it is going to be trying to open your eyes to why the virtues are worth pursuing. It can be tough to imagine it when the environment we're in is dominated by so much of the vice.
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